tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-57334754087866140252024-03-13T13:50:02.417-05:00Leuk, I am your fatherUpdates on Melissa's status.bobthewonderllamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16396258727693557442noreply@blogger.comBlogger72125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-8656054192939381632011-08-15T10:04:00.002-05:002011-08-15T10:14:28.266-05:00Beyond the HorizonWhen I started taking maintenance chemotherapy (an intricate waltz of pills and doctors' visits on ever-changing schedules) I never thought the end would come. I honestly dug in for the long haul. It is with no little wonder that I can announce to you that we're past the first hurdle. I have stopped taking all the rest of the pills. After I stopped taking ATRA, I really felt like this ordeal might end. Now I can envision a new age to my life: one in which I am not defined by my disease.<div>
<br /></div><div>To everyone who has read this, thank you! Updates will likely be even more sporadic than they have been the last year. I will still be going to the hematologist to make sure the blood looks good, and I'll let you know how it goes. </div><div>
<br /></div><div>The biggest thanks of all, however, are reserved for Teddy. We all who have benefited from his devotion owe him a huge debt of gratitude. For my own part, I fear I will never repay that debt; I can only spend all the rest of my life annoying him in my attempts. Thank you, Teddy. Without you, the world would be a much darker place.</div>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-41611736926895168362011-05-17T21:39:00.004-05:002011-05-17T22:02:22.205-05:00The End is In SightI can't believe it, but this coming weekend I'll be starting the last round of ATRA I'll ever do. In just 3 months I can stop taking anywhere from 2 to 24 pills per day. I still haven't taken much time to reflect on my lot, but I'm very lucky to be here, and even luckier to be worrying about so many little things, instead of so many big things. I have it very good. I don't wish Acute Promyelocytic Leukemia on anyone, but in a lot of ways it's been good for me.<div><br /></div><div>When I went to see Dr. Robin today, I had more questions than I've had in a long time. Mostly my appointments are very routine, and I am usually the one who conducts it. I remember my dosages, treatment schedules, and how to spell the names of my pills better than Dr. Robin does. That might make him sound like a hack, but consider: he took my appointment when a better-qualified doctor was going to deny me that first time I switched away from Dr. Larson. It was the day before my appointment, this other doctor decided she wouldn't take my case, and he said yeah, sure, I'll see what I can do. So we've learned a lot from eachother, and from other doctors. I'll always be grateful to him. Anyhow, today I talked about the end-game: where we go from here. I had to make sure that 24 months from the beginning of maintenance therapy was the correct end time (it is), and wondered if I'll have to repeat a bone marrow biopsy (I will). I think I knew both of those things, but once upon a time I said, "That sounds like a problem for Future-Melissa!" and promptly worried about something else. I'll do appointments every 3 months from here, still repeating blood work to make sure I look good after stopping all the pills.</div><div><br /></div><div>Stopping all the pills. Gosh. I've known, intellectually, it was coming for a long time. I've joked and planned a drinking binge for whichever day I decide I've had enough. But today it's become real: I won't be taking pills anymore on my birthday this year. I'll turn 29 and not take a single cytotoxic chemical. Will I feel better than I've ever felt? It's academic to wonder how long the leukemia had been brewing in my bones, making me sick and weak (well... as sick and weak as I ever have been, which isn't very), but I suspect I'll feel stronger than I have felt in a long time once the poison pills are out of my system. I guess we'll find out. Eventually I'll be able to donate blood.</div><div><br /></div><div>That's right. Me. Donate blood. Yes, I'm getting the heebie-jeebies just thinking about it, but once I'm able to, I plan to do it as often as they'll let me. I don't even know how often that is; I've only done it once. (Funny story; I walked a mile in the hot sun afterwards, shaking with leftover fear, and nearly collapsed when I got home.) I feel I owe it to so many people -- I literally cannot count how many people have saved my life. Hell, if you live in the area and have donated positive-type blood, you probably gave a little to me. I needed that much. So I'm going to start giving back, if they'll let me. I feel a sense of responsibility to anyone who needs as much help as I did. Did: past tense; I've long since kicked the blood habit.</div><div><br /></div><div>It's been a long and winding road, difficult at times, occasionally unpaved, but never lonely. Thanks, everyone, for your continued support. I'll keep you up to date with the changes my body undergoes as I stop taking medicine, hopefully all for the better. I'm strong like that.</div>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-79889146812161741962010-11-15T22:15:00.003-06:002010-11-15T22:24:24.776-06:00Is this thing still on?Ahem. *tap tap* Hello? <div><br /></div><div>I know I have been, uhh, lax doesn't cover it. I'm a terrible blogger. So here's the update:</div><div><br /></div><div>There are no updates. My maintenance therapy is working beautifully. My numbers are consistently good. I'm tolerating the increased dosage of medicine fairly well - better than expected, actually. There is one embarrassing side-effect that I'm no fan of: <i>acne</i>. I've never had more than a touch of it my entire life, and it's annoying. It's really no more than a few whiteheads, so I guess I'll live. In fact, it's so mild the doctor didn't even want to do anything about it. But still... Phooey.</div><div><br /></div><div>The count-down is on until I can get off this crazy thing and make that last step into a cancer-free life: giving up the pill-box. August 2011 - put it on your calendars! I guess it'll be nice to have the liberty to indulge in more than one or two drinks at a time - that's all I'll have in a week, normally - but for all intents and purposes I'm just about done. Woot!!</div><div><br /></div><div>Thanks for your support, everyone. And hey, how cool is it that a facebook post covers all you need to know about my doctor's visit these days? </div>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-75804123221555355672010-03-23T16:03:00.002-05:002010-03-23T16:06:07.854-05:00Addendum!I'm on a writing spree! Two in two days! So Dr. Robin got more information on why I'm taking so much medicine, and it turns out that there IS an excellent answer. It's part of an experimental treatment that seems to be bearing out a rather shocking hypothesis:<div><br /></div><div>More medicine works better than less.</div><div><br /></div><div>I can't believe it, either. Good to know, though, that not only did I receive cutting-edge treatment at Rush, I am also getting smart, compassionate care here at Dr. Robin's office.</div>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-2064765193296604602010-03-22T22:51:00.003-05:002010-03-22T23:09:44.708-05:00The Hard and The EasyIt's nice to have Teddy around. I say that first-off because it's so important. He gently helps me remember, when I'm worked up about something, that I'm lucky to have the luxury of being upset about the small things. And it's true! All-in-all, it's a good day for me.<div><br /></div><div>As I hinted, I was upset today. I've been working since my last update in January to get an appointment with a new hematologist due to switching from my COBRA coverage to Teddy's United Health Crap. Hopefully, this will all soon be obsolete! But in the mean time, the appointment that I've had put off again and again what with one thing and another was this afternoon. This morning I got a phone call from the new doctor's office and I assumed it was a confirmation of my appointment - albeit a little late in the game. No, in fact, it was the receptionist (a lovely woman) giving me good and bad news:</div><div><br /></div><div>Bad news: The hematologist that Dr. Larson recommended to me <i>doesn't see leukemia patients.</i> . . . Once again, the doctor that I've been working with to make an appointment <i>won't even see me</i>. Head, meet desk.</div><div><br /></div><div>Good news: Some other random guy in the office <i>will</i>, on short notice, at the same time as my appointment was supposed to be. Whew, dodged a bullet there, right...?</div><div><br /></div><div>...Right?</div><div><br /></div><div>Dr. Erwin Robin isn't a fun man to talk with. He speaks quickly and aggressively, uses medical jargon and Latin interchangeably with English, and has a generally domineering personality. However, he also admits when he isn't sure, goes to someone who IS sure, and then gets more opinions when it still doesn't sound right to him. He's sharp, thorough, and he clearly cares, even though he is hard to talk to -- even though my Med-Speak is up to snuff, it's just as important that Teddy understands every word he says. And after all, he took me on short notice and he did it with alacrity.</div><div><br /></div><div>So, onto the appointment itself. The offices are cozy and personalized, in sharp contrast with airy, sterilized Rush. The lab is one room, with one guy named Bob who had my Complete Blood Count finished while I held the gauze on my GAPING STAB WOUND (I kid... mostly). And Dr. Robin was impressed with my blood levels and how well I'm tolerating chemo doses that are, apparently, six times higher than normal for my diagnosis. That was what was puzzling him - why am I taking so much medicine? It's abnormal, even for someone who is high-risk (I am) and didn't get enough intra-thecal chemo (I didn't). He conferred with Dr. Venugopal, the head of hematology at Rush and a long-time friend of his, and Dr. Venu wants me to continue what I'm doing, but Dr. Robin is still not certain it's in my long-term best interest. This causes me a small amount of anxiety, but it's good to know that I have a doctor who is worried about me and who is taking every measure to ensure I'm getting what I need and no more.</div><div><br /></div><div>For now, things continue as usual. I am as healthy as a horse, except for that pesky cancer. I'll update you if Dr. Robin updates me! And, as Teddy so aptly reminded me, we should all remember that I'm in the home-stretch now.</div>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-40910142615231395152010-01-21T01:02:00.002-06:002010-01-21T01:10:50.023-06:00Latest AppointmentWell my appointment today went just swimmingly. Once again, my blood work is holding strong. My more specialized blood test looking for leukemia markers came up negative, and we wrapped everything up with Dr. Larson. I feel the whole thing went very well. She said that, since we're coming up on one year since my diagnosis, I can soon start going only every other month. Woo!<div><br /></div><div>One year since my diagnosis. I can hardly believe that. I'm almost back to where I started - cancer-free, able to do most things, working, and simply enjoying life. Looking back, soon this will only be a blip on the radar - a short but alarming blip. </div><div><br /></div><div>Insurance is a sonofabitch, but things are worked out and I have some meaningful recommendations from Dr. Larson. From here, it's just a matter of taking the dive and picking someone new. At least it's a 10-minute jaunt from home instead of an hour-long ordeal each way! </div><div><br /></div><div>So, as always, things are looking up. Teddy and I have all kinds of fun stuff planned for the coming months, and in general, life is settling back into something close to normal. In fact, things have scarcely ever looked better.</div>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-50326558440227879462010-01-13T13:28:00.002-06:002010-01-13T13:32:47.097-06:00Ahhh, Insurance!I recently switched to Teddy's insurance plan to save some money and some hassle (my former employer are utter nitwits concerning COBRA) and I half expected this, but I'm having to switch doctors. This is a real blow to me, as a very much like my current haematologist, Dr. Larson. <div><br /></div><div>The list of providers is just names, addresses, phone numbers... none of it means anything to me. I'm totally lost as for where to turn. I've tried asking for a recommendation from Dr. Larson's office, but surprisingly no one is answering me.</div><div><br /></div><div>I know I'll get this worked out, and I'd like to make my appointment this month and just pay the out-of-network fees to get things all wrapped up and make sure I have a copy of my chart for the next doctor. I'm just a little lost at the moment.</div>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-22085296384555595072009-11-09T20:57:00.001-06:002009-11-09T20:57:52.525-06:00Fun Side-EffectsI like to drink. I truly, truly enjoy a good craft beer, a lucious bottle of wine, or smooth spirits. I crave a nice cocktail, even. I'm not a drunkard, just appreciate an excellent drink. So it was a bit of a blow when I read that my 6-Mercaptopurine (Meerkat Top Urine? Metaporcupine?) can cause undue liver damage when combined with alcohol. I guess I am embarking, unwillingly, on a sabattical from spirits; a break from booze; a furlough from firewater; a holiday from the hard stuff? In all likelihood, it's until August 2011, which will be the end of my maintenance therapy. It looks like I'll be aging those bottles a little longer than intended. 2007 Dark Lord ought to be an outright rarity by '11, but here's hoping it tastes all the sweeter for the wait.<br /><br />...Anyone in the market for a designated driver?Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-66289784439694226332009-11-03T18:29:00.002-06:002009-11-03T18:45:08.093-06:00Happy Sandwich Day!It was another uneventful visit to Dr. Larson on Monday! And I can tell you, it's fantastic to be able to say that. My numbers look good, the pills I'm taking now aren't affecting my blood counts like they occasionally do for some people, and I'm starting another pill entirely next week. It's called 6-Mercaptopurine (these names just get wackier and wackier, don't they?) and once again, it's a mild immunosuppressant and side effects are mainly stomach-related. This is a daily pill, and it completes my trifecta of maintenance therapy that won't end until August 2011. <br /><br />I'm doing so well, all things considered! Still looking for a job, but I'm hopeful. The holidays are approaching fast and I'm feeling festive! It starts with Thanksgiving, then Teddy's Birthday on the 28th, Erin and Lanie's birthdays, and then I'll start thinking about Christmas. Even getting dark at 5pm, I do love this time of year.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-84628957921463236262009-09-26T23:44:00.002-05:002009-09-27T00:06:15.680-05:00Lew Zealand's Amazing Boomerang Fish!Why yes, I <span style="font-style: italic;">have</span> been watching the Muppets. Why do you ask?<br /><br />So I had a doctor's appointment on Friday. As usual, everything went swimmingly. My numbers were all good - I'm not even anemic any longer! Good enough, in fact, that I am able to start my second of the three pills that will make up my two-year maintenance therapy. The first was the ATRA, and this second is called Metho...trexo... something. I take eight pills of this once a week on an empty stomach and, from what I hear, then I try really hard not to be sick. I'm starting Monday (because who likes Mondays anyway?) so I'll let you know how things go. Although this pill is a chemo drug, it won't affect me as badly as IV chemo did. No appetite loss, no hair loss, just a little stomach illness.<br /><br />Speaking of hair, mine is coming back thick, wavy, and blondy! I could upload pictures, or you could all come see for yourself next week when I'm in Auburn at my parents'! I hope to see a lot of friends and family whom I've been missing (and not calling nearly often enough...). Teddy will be in town from October 3rd through 10th, but I'll be staying through the 15th. Hope everyone gets to meet Teddy - as anyone who reads this blog undoubtedly knows, he's a fantastic guy.<br /><br />Love,<br />MelissaMelissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-79213656486829762492009-08-27T21:11:00.002-05:002009-08-27T21:12:41.555-05:00Dear Northwesterners;Teddy and I will see you at the beginning of October! :)<br /><br />Love,<br /><br />MelissaMelissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-39410623313239070972009-08-24T22:28:00.001-05:002009-08-24T22:29:23.378-05:00Lookit That Fuzz!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2659/3852242111_aa12386239.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 500px; height: 333px;" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2659/3852242111_aa12386239.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-2988757113343271202009-08-17T22:42:00.001-05:002009-08-17T22:43:37.489-05:00Finally, a Health UpdateI hear a few people have been waiting rather <em>impatiently</em> for this update! Well Dr. Larson and I had a chat today about my progress and the path I am heading down. Let me say first that my blood numbers are all coming up nicely - although I am slightly anemic she is not concerned and I'm still well within an acceptable range for my point in the leukemia journey. Outside of some dry skin I haven't had any health issues during the intervening month or so since my last visit. Tomorrow I start on <a class="snap_shots" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tretinoin">ATRA</a>, which I have taken before with few side effects other than (ugh) more dry skin. In a month I'll start another more serious chemo pill, and a month or two after that I'll start yet another. The idea is this: monitor a specific marker in my blood for signs that the leukemia is returning, because some of the drugs I will be taking further down the road sometimes cause blood numbers to drop. The moral of the story is, I'm in the best kind of remission but I'm still taking pills to make extra sure that this crap isn't coming back. <br /><br />In short: it's aaaaall good.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-87949489643557924512009-07-30T16:34:00.003-05:002009-07-30T16:43:50.992-05:00Check Out the Stubble!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3488/3773364018_3e35d4df5a_o.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 500px; height: 333px;" src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3488/3773364018_0154fb0b84.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-5762351207545467662009-07-08T14:18:00.000-05:002009-07-08T14:19:33.516-05:00Hooray Surgery!<span style="font-size:78%;">Cross-posted from... oh forget it; you know where my blog is. -Melissa</span><br /><br />As you may recall, my line was removed yesterday. I was a bit worried about it, as the last time they removed an intravenous catheter it was rather uncomfortable and I got no pity (nor anaesthetic) from the surgeons who removed it. Well, it was still uncomfortable, but I dealt - and they did give me some lidocaine to numb, which is a mixed blessing as I hate getting shots. There's only so comfortable they can make you when they yank something out of both a great big vein in your neck and down towards your heart. I got to experience stitches without anaesthesia once again, but it's less horrible than you might think - a choice between getting more lidocaine to numb, which actually stings and burns for about 30 seconds, or a couple sharp sticks and some pulling, which hurts for maybe a second. I expected quite a lot of bleeding, considering the position of the catheter, but so far I've experienced none. Woot! All in all, easy peasy. In fact, with my line out, in a week I'll be able to shower without taping plastic wrap over a perpetually open wound! With that out of the way I'll probably be down to 5-minute showers. Showers hold no allure these days, however, as I can't experience hot water running through my hair; it was the only thing I liked about showering, to be perfectly honest, and now it's the only thing I <em>don't</em> like about being bald.<br /><br />In less-awesome news, my headaches have been unbearable starting sunday evening and going into tuesday. Bad enough that I took the dilaudid that I swore I would never need outside of the hospital... As a matter of fact I called my doctor and left a message because the headaches had gotten worse and not better; of course, she never called me back. But today things seem to have turned around, finally. All things considered I'm feeling awesome today, and havent taken any narcotics. In fact, I think I can get by from here on with just Tylenol if things stay as good as they are today.<br /><br />Speaking of things that aren't awesome, I've been waiting for, oh, five hours for my landlord-slash-Teddy's-uncle's lackeys to buy a door to replace ours, which has had a massive hole in the back side since before we moved in. They measured it around 9:30 am and went out seeming quite efficient to buy a door to measurements. Hours later, my poor kittens are still locked up in the spare bedroom (to keep them from escaping while the guys have the door off) and I'm prevented from napping or mailing out a package to my momsy. What is this, cable installation?<br /><br />But let's not dwell on the bad. Like I said somewhere in the middle of my rant, all things considered I'm feeling awesome. Every day is a new day and things are only getting better.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-15622509322411049602009-07-06T12:47:00.003-05:002009-07-06T12:53:51.229-05:00For Amy.<a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/bobthewonderllama/3694258897/in/photostream/"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 500px; height: 333px;" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2597/3694258897_4f403ffbd1.jpg?" border="0" alt="" /></a><br />Amy made me promise to post pictures of Melissa's hair and eyelashes as they're regrowing. So, here goes.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/bobthewonderllama/3694259095/in/photostream/"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 333px; height: 500px;" src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3640/3694259095_b6526f1c5c.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/bobthewonderllama/3694259243/in/photostream/"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 500px; height: 333px;" src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3541/3694259243_2826fb274f.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a>bobthewonderllamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16396258727693557442noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-24522140036204471232009-07-03T12:39:00.001-05:002009-07-08T16:59:47.371-05:00In Which Melissa RantsThis post has been removed for personal reasons. I'll be happy to discuss the contents, which dealt with losing my job, on an individual basis.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-30718109286361495482009-06-30T10:32:00.002-05:002009-06-30T10:36:36.823-05:00Woohoooooooo!<span style="font-size:78%;">This, and most of the posts from me, is cross-posted from <a href="http://carmen-queasy.livejournal.com">my Livejournal</a>.</span><br /><br />Suffice it to say the doctor's appointment yesterday went well. How well? <br /><a name="cutid1"></a><br />I've been moved from a weekly to a monthly appointment schedule and taken off all daily medications, allowed to go out into public with no mask, and told that in a month I can be relieved of dietary restrictions! That's right, people - one month to sushi!! YAY! Also, I'm having my Hickman catheter (basically a tube with three IV sites permanently implanted in my chest to make it easy to draw blood and give medications) removed next week - which means they anticipate not having to draw my blood or give me meds as often. YAY! The doctor accepted that I am never getting intrathecal chemo again. YAY!! She also said that I probably won't need any more bone marrow biopsies because I'm in molecular remission. YAY!!!<br /><br />And the biggest news of all? I can go back to work! The doctor is sending me a note and I've decided two weeks is an appropriate time line. I was going to shoot for next week, but then I got the surgery scheduled so I'm holding off. I think I'll start going to the gym to get some stamina back. Even sitting at a desk for 8 hours a day is hard work when you're used to laying around...<br /><br />This all sounds like great news, but it's not 100% rosy. I'm still going to be on what's called maintenance therapy starting next month. It's pill chemo for two years, and though it's not as strong as IV chemo, it will take something out of me. It also has the possibility of messing with my blood numbers, and for that reason some people choose not to do it. Because I'm in the best kind of remission the doctor went right out and said that she would be understanding if I took that option, but she wants to try it first. So we'll see how it affects me, and if it's intolerable I can just decline. Sounds good to me!<br /><br />All in all, a great hospital visit.<br /><br />So my mom went home yesterday. We got her to the airport for her early-morning flight and it was all I could do not to cry. I will really, really miss her. Although it was for a terrible reason, getting to spend so much time with my mom has been so good for me - and you need to be able to pull something good out of a situation like this. I realized how close Mom and I are, and we had so many great times. More than just having someone to help me, I am going to miss having someone to be with me though I'm happy that she gets to resume her life. So it's bittersweet that she finally gets to go home. <br /><br />Teddy took today and yesterday off work and we've been hanging out. Hooray for getting to spend time as a couple! I have to admit, I have missed that a LOT, as much as I liked having my mom around. We spent yesterday hanging out, and today looks like more of the same. Ahhhhhh, life is good.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-85484938880782893672009-06-25T07:06:00.000-05:002009-06-25T07:10:08.927-05:00The 'RoidsI'm having trouble sleeping lately, and I'm blaming it on the steroids they're giving me to keep my headaches in check. Yes, I'm still getting headaches from a lumbar puncture ages ago - I'm a modern freakin' marvel of medicine if you ask my doctor, pretty average if you ask a lot of ladies who've had lumbar punctures before. As the steroids are being tapered off (one of those things you don't just up and quit, I guess) my ravenous appetite and sleeplessness are kinda getting better, but still bothersome at odd times. The thing is, all the sleep I've lost, Teddy<span class="ljuser" user="bob_wonderllama" style="white-space: nowrap;"></span> seems to have found! He goes to bed at 7:30 these days if he can - no lies. I want to invent a brain-machine that will channel at least <em>some</em> of his sleep to me... ROAR!<br /><br />In other news, my mom will finally be going home soon. That doesn't sound the way I intended it... You see, the saint of a woman has been here since my diagnosis in February. Living with us. Away from her husband, job, income, responsibilities, and essentially her life. Oh my god, how do I deserve such a mother's love? I am so happy for her that she finally gets to go home, which I can tell she desperately misses, but I'm also so sad. The bonding we've had in these months has been phenomenal and I'm just not ready to give up getting up and having Malt O Meal with Mom every morning like when I was a kid... I'm also not sure I'm totally ready to live on my own again, doing the grocery shopping, laundry, garbage, and things like that that require carrying things up and down steep stairs that, I admit, I still have trouble making up under my own power without huffing and puffing. I'm getting better, though, and I need to get better faster. Lately we've been spending hours a day just playing Rock Band; it's been a hoot! We've done some cooking, but not as much as we've wanted to due to the heat. So Monday we take Mom to the airport, then doodle around for a few hours before my doctor's appointment.<br /><br />Which takes me to my next point: where am I going from here? When can I go back to work? I feel almost ready, and I definitely feel ready to replace that lost income! We're not drowning, but we're also not sipping margaritas on the poolside, kiddies. Luckily my insurance coverage continues to be excellent, and I am getting reduced COBRA rates (don't look that up if you don't have to; it's insurance continuation and a pain in the ass). I plan on this appointment being a quiz of the doctor as to how soon I can get back along with life. I won't say that I want to go back to work (I've been pampered and praised for 4 months... would you? ;) but I want to go back to working, if that makes sense. Contributing. I feel lazy. I also would like to hear that some time soon I can go out in crowded places without a face mask and can eat sushi again and even take out the cat litter. My immune system is getting back to normal finally, and I want to take advantage of this fact! So after my Monday appointment I promise to let you all know the prognosis for the rest of my summer, if not life.<br /><br />Heavy thoughts for the middle of the night. Perhaps I should go back to reading my mom's cat-themed murder mystery fluff. Sadly it is all I have left in the house that I haven't read or attempted to read.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08590464603422561786noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-8160915072156855612009-06-18T17:13:00.001-05:002009-06-18T17:13:40.516-05:00To market, to market...Home from the hospital!<p>Melissa's feeling lots better and the doctors sent her home! Looks like it might be a nice, relaxing weekend.bobthewonderllamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16396258727693557442noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-86173765790190603852009-06-16T13:33:00.003-05:002009-06-16T13:40:13.877-05:00Too tired to write a creative blog post titleYesterday was not as good as the day before. Today is turning out to be a little better.<br /><br />Melissa's headaches got a lot worse yesterday morning so they started giving her <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hydromorphone">dilaudid </a> for the pain. It knocked her out at first, but she's feeling much better today. She still doesn't feel 100%, but she's needed less pain medicine. They took her downstairs for a CT scan last night, to maybe see what's causing the headaches, but we haven't heard any results yet.<br /><br />On the bright side, her mouth sores are continuing to heal and her blood counts are starting to rise. Good things!bobthewonderllamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16396258727693557442noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-2372897703421255432009-06-15T15:35:00.000-05:002009-06-15T15:36:43.982-05:00Movin' on up.This post has been sitting in the drafts folder of my email for a couple days now. I guess I pressed "save" instead of "send". Whoops.<p>Around 7 or so Friday night they finally got a room for Melissa on the good old 10th floor. The difference between the two sections of the hospital are striking. If I didn't mention before, we were on a general floor. It was noisy and kind of dirty. The 10th, by contrast, is clean and quiet. It's like they're in different hospitals. Amy says that we're spoiled - in a way, I agree. The other floor is nicer than most of the general floors I've ever seen, but it's still a Super 8 motel in comparison. (I'm not saying this is the Four Seasons. Maybe a Best Western or Holiday Inn Express, though.)<p>(Here starts the part of the post I added today.) <p>They found a slight bacterial infection in Melissa's blood culture on Saturday. By Sunday, though, it was gone. The antibiotics they have been giving her must have done their magic. Her headches have mostly dissapeared, except for a couple bad relapses. The mouth sores are getting better, and they're doing a good job of managing the pain. <p>Hopefully, they'll be sending her home soon. But we don't really know when.bobthewonderllamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16396258727693557442noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-11965329924206780332009-06-11T16:00:00.000-05:002009-06-11T16:01:09.007-05:00Oh bother.The doctors have decided to admit Melissa to the hospital again. She has gotten some mouth sores (pretty common with some of the chemo) but she had a slight fever this morning and that always spooks them, especially when her blood counts are so low.<p>The doctor said she'll probably be out by Sunday, at the latest. I'll keep you posted with any news.bobthewonderllamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16396258727693557442noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-226720160247085242009-06-09T18:45:00.000-05:002009-06-09T18:46:35.865-05:00Cat ScanThis isn't leukemia related at all, but it's REALLY CUTE.<br /><br /><img src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2179/3611698279_c52948e49c.jpg" /><br /><br />Ziggy sat on the scanner.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/bobthewonderllama/3611698279/sizes/o/">Link to larger size.</a>bobthewonderllamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16396258727693557442noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5733475408786614025.post-79483265976405779612009-06-09T18:43:00.000-05:002009-06-09T18:45:39.688-05:00Lah dee dah, update!<span style="font-size:78%;"><span style="font-style: italic;">From Melissa, cross-posted from </span><a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://carmen-queasy.livejournal.com/"> Livejournal.</a></span><br /><br />You guys have got to be sick of hearing about my sick ass by now, huh? That's all I ever talk about! But here's the latest.<br /><br />Last week (6/1 - 6/5) I was in the hospital for my last round of chemo. The Wednesday before that I got a bone marrow biopsy. Now everyone I've talked to said that my biopsy came back clean on the most sensitive level (molecular - that's right, I don't even have cancer in my molecules) except if you ask my actual doctor who insists the results aren't back yet. O.o I guess it's possible that everyone else was looking at a different test... but it's a strange thing. So I guess I'm waiting until I talk to her in person on 6/19 to get the real truth on that.<br /><br />Speaking of squeezing the truth out of Dr. Larson, once again they decided to spring intra-thecal chemo on me at the last minute. In case you need a recap, that's where they do a lumbar puncture, remove some spinal fluid, and replace it with chemo drugs to decrease the risk that I have a nervous system relapse. The problem with this (bwahahaha - one problem anyway) is that chemo drugs make my brain angry. And by angry I mean intensely painful unless I lay flat on my back. Coming back to the original intent of this paragraph, I spoke with the good doctor after I had this intense headache for two weeks last time they did this and she agreed that the risks may outweigh the benefits. Which is why it irked me that instead of calling or visiting my room to speak to me about having doubts in that decision, she sent some other doctor to hardball me. The phrase "Well you're going to need it anyway so you might as well get it now" was thrown about. Sooomeone just lost some professionalism points. The thing is, last time she said she was afraid it had caused chemical meningitis and was unsure she wanted to do any more of this on me. *Massive eye roll*<br /><br />Anyway, I'm home now. I'm sick to my stomach a decent amount of the time and I have a bad headache, but I went to clinic today and my numbers were good. I'm getting by, and I'm definitely medicated (so don't you worry there, darlings!). I'm thinking about going back to work. Not just now - just thinking. Maybe in July. I think I'll need more IT chemo, but if indeed I'm in molecular remission my chances of relasping are insanely low... so maybe I'll get back in the swing of things again soon.bobthewonderllamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16396258727693557442noreply@blogger.com0